A three-foot continental giant rabbit named Simon allegedly died in the cargo hold while traveling on a United Airlines flight from London’s Heathrow Airport to Chicago’s O’Hare International Airport.
“Simon,” a giant bunny which was expected to mature into the largest rabbit in the world, was DOA when it was off-loaded at the airport.
The news of the rabbit’s demise was profoundly important, as most people had no idea that there was such a thing as four foot tall rabbits that you could see even when you were not profoundly intoxicated.
A United Airlines spokesperson offered condolences and an upgrade to business class to the breeder, Annette Edwards, who is an ex-Playboy Bunny (you can’t make this stuff up!)
*Guests to the memorial services for Simon will be treated to pale lager and hasenpfeffer.
*Actually, this part is made up….